I miss my kitchen

Today I am free.  

I am free from rehearsals with unwilling children.

I am free from after school commitments and meetings.

I am free from preparing for next week.

Because next week, school's out!  

Last night was my last choir concert of the year.  It was absolutely remarkable and I am very proud of my students (and myself) for making it really happen.  These last concerts (at each of my schools) made the end of this year totally worth it.   Despite their excessive talking, their lack of responsibility and their laziness at times, these 12, 13 and 14 year olds are TALENTED.  And they proved their worth in two fabulous concerts.   Great job. 

And now that is all DONE.

And I am free.

And today I got to cook in my kitchen again. 

And I amazed at how I literally miss my kitchen.  And cooking.  

I missed throwing tilapia, olive oil and lemon pepper seasoning in foil for the grill. 

I missed my measuring cups when I leveled out the brown rice.

I missed my spices.  Hello spices.  

And I missed my wooden spoons.  Wooden spoons are the best.  I might write about them later. 

Anyways, now that life will even out again and Summer time is just around the corner... I hope to see a lot more of my lovely kitchen.  And a lot less of junior high kids.  (Still love them, though!)

Back to School Eve

On this evening before the next semester of school starts in this extremely challenging year for me- I feel good.  So good. 

I am so blessed in life.  

Winter break couldn't have been better for me.  Every day was eventful, enjoyable and relaxing in some way.  

I have a very positive outlook on this semester.  

I am going to be nicer in some ways.

I am going to be more strict in other ways.

But I am going to smile a lot more.  

And I am going to teach these children to love music.  

My students

I'm thankful for my students past and present. Even tho this has been a rough year- I have so many gems in my classes that make me laugh and give me hope.

Last Friday night I was able to visit mesquite high schools choir cafe night. The seniors this year were my first class 5 years ago!! So I know all the kids now basically from 9-12 grade. It was the funniest reunion night ever. I just kept seeing face after face of past students and now- new friends.

Much Needed Pedicure

Today I cried at lunch.

I cried because I realize that school has REALLY started.  I must have been in denial for the last few days as teachers went back and then yesterday was the actual first day of school.  I honestly was pretty content with all the teacher mumbo jumbo business- meetings, long lunches, getting our classrooms ready, making copies.....  

Even the first day of school.   It's always fun to meet your new classes, the students in them and try out all your new approaches to the year.  I was totally motived to get up early, have a nice breakfast, I even got a good workout in after school.  

But then today.  Oh today.  Today I realized Summer is over and this is my life again.  

I must have been in denial because usually I cry the night before school starts.

Some of you think I'm being cute or trying to creative as I write this post.  Some may think I'm being silly when I say I cried.  Or perhaps thinking that it's just a mopey sad feeling.  Or that I really didn't shed tears.  

I'm actually kinda mad, depressed, shocked and quite simply: mourning my past life.  

My past life of:

-amazing vacations (Puerto Rico, Boston)

-sleeping in

-waking up early to go to the gym IF I WANTED TO

- trying new recipes

- shopping

- keeping up on all my household chores

- going to lunch everyday.  everyday.  (Hunter will witness this was true.)

- decorating my house

- going to the Temple during the day when it's not so busy

- throwing dinner parties

- not feeling depressed on Sunday nights

- feeling like I can take on new tasks, responsibilities, and opportunities because I have the time.

- crafts

- leaving the craft mess out because I could clean it up tomorrow

- being able to babysit for friends and family

- swimming and lounging by the pool

- spending hours with my mom doing frivolous errands and talking the whole time

- driving into Phoenix to have lunch with Todd

- doing the dishes everyday

- serving in my Ward more

- reading time

- internet wasting time

- blogging time

- organizing time

- having quiet time

- having loud music blaring time

- having time.

Now my days will be spent:

-waking up early

- having to put makeup on immediately in the morning

- putting on a friendly face when my brain is still asleep

- teaching in incredibly hot classrooms that do not have sufficient AC

- making copies

-thinking about what's coming up next

- filling out papers for everything

- going to meetings

- writing POs

- reading 60 emails a day about stuff I don't care about

- writing 60 emails a day about stuff I don't care about

- working out after a long HOT day of telling students to be quiet when I'd rather go to sleep

-coming home to chores, dinner making, and all the things I HAVE to do because tomorrow I don't have TIME because I have to go to WORK. 

I'm being very negative.  

Honestly.  I don't really want to say this next stuff but I think it will be therapeutic to do so. 

I have an amazing job.

I am truly blessed to HAVE a job.

I work with fantastic colleagues, students and parents.

My schools are 1 and 4 miles away from my house. 

I have a long lunch.

I teach CHOIR so there are no state mandated tests or really requirements or pressure.

I teach CHOIR so my students actually WANT to be in my class. 

I teach choir so my lesson planning is VERY basic.

I get to work with people.

I get to influence children for the better every day.

I get lots of holidays and breaks.

I get to be the boss of my classes.

Enough of that.  

Mom took me for a pedicure this afternoon.   It helped me calm myself down.  Realize there is still time in my life for enjoyable activities.   It helped me to come home and do the dishes and laundry that I have avoided for three days.  It helped me COOK dinner rather than whine to Hunter and say "Let's go out to eat".   It helped me realize life goes on.  And it helped me get my feelings out in this post.  

I cried because I remember what this is like again.  

Anyways....

Here are some classroom shots:

And the pedicure that brought me back to reality:

178 school days until Summer.

Schpeal

Okay so every year I have to give certian "schpeals" to the children about important subjects in choir... such as: when it is appropriate to raise your hand...when to completely leave me alone because I look like I am about to murder someone....why we sing about God all the time in choir....why you must not wear too much makeup at the concert....why I get to eat in class and they don't etc. etc. etc.

Today I was about to give one out to my 8th grade girls and I started with "Okay here's an important schpeal so listen up-"

When I was interrupted- 

 (WHAT? Natalie- there is no way those sweet angelic junior high-ers would EVER interrupt you?)

Yes interrupted with a gal who said "What's a schpeal?  It sounds like a tasty drink." 

....